


lie to me

by reignofdreams



Series: bid my blood to run [1]
Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Ben Solo Needs A Hug, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Gen, Implied Armitage Hux/Kylo Ren, Nightmares, Young Ben Solo
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-17
Updated: 2018-03-17
Packaged: 2019-04-03 17:53:38
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 759
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14001417
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/reignofdreams/pseuds/reignofdreams
Summary: ...tell me it will be okay





	lie to me

**Author's Note:**

> Fill for the [Hurt Comfort Kylo Fest](https://hurtkylofest.tumblr.com/).  
> Day 1 - Situational: Leia or Han comforts young Ben Solo after a nightmare.

This dream starts out far better than Ben is used to.

There isn't the usual blood squelching slick beneath his feet, no screams piercing the air or stench of charred flesh choking him.

Instead, there are long fingers combing nimbly through his hair as he lays curled into someone's lithe form. Occasionally they murmur softly, their voice a smooth lilting tenor that, although muffled and unintelligible, makes a small content smile curl Ben's lips. This feels different than anything he's felt with his family. He feels cherished and safe, like here in these arms it is okay for him to be a little broken.

Whoever this dream person is, Ben knows instinctively that they are important and that he loves them.

The fingers stop, all warmth vanishing as Ben's eyes shoot open. A wave of grief crashes over him.

Blood. So much blood, and all he can think is _No no no not again_.

But this still isn't his familiar nightmare.

This is so much worse.

Worse because there is a slim form slumped boneless against him—

_(he just knows this is the same person)_

—a head full of striking red hair resting against his shoulder in a cruel mockery of sleep.

He can't tear his eyes away from the crackling red saber protruding from the figure's lower back. He can feel the hilt humming in his own hand.

_No no no nonono—_

"NO!"

Ben jolts awake, scream still on his lips as his stomach _(his whole being)_ savagely rebels.

He barely manages to fumble his way free of his twisted sweat-soaked sheets and into the fresher before he's retching violently into the toilet. He gags and chokes, tears streaming down his cheeks until only bile sears its way up his throat.

Ben doesn’t even realize someone is there with him until familiar calloused fingers are brushing the dark strands of hair back from his damp forehead. Only then does he come back to himself to feel the recognizable vibration of the Falcon's engines. His dad is a warm, comforting presence at his back. Han doesn't immediately whisper the same soothing assurances Leia does when Ben has a nightmare ( _vision_ that insistent voice whispers).

Ben is grateful for his dad's presence nonetheless, slumping back into that tall solid frame as all the energy drains from him in a dizzying rush.  He lets himself stay there, soaking in the support as the trembling in his limbs begins to subside, lets himself drift to the feeling of large slow circles being rubbed into his back.

They sit there for what feels like a small eternity as Ben’s mind loops that final image over and over again. He has no idea who the man in his dream is, but he knows with the same soul deep certainty that he usually associates with the Force that this dream person loves him. Or will love him it seems.

And Ben is going to be the death of him.

The thought nearly makes him sick all over again, and only his dad’s grounding touches keep the horror from overwhelming him again.

“You gonna be okay, kiddo?” Han finally asks. His hands move to Ben’s shoulders, gently urging him to turn around.

Ben does, meeting his dad’s soft gaze with his own haunted one.

“I—” Ben hesitates. He knows he’s getting too old for this, knows that his almost regular nightmares are beginning to make his parents truly worry. He doesn’t know how to explain to them or his Uncle Luke that he spends most of his nights soaked in blood and breathing ash.

This dream has shaken him more than usual, and Ben foregoes his normal false assurances. He wraps his arms tightly around his father, burying his face in his shoulder instead. Han doesn’t hesitate, curling his arms securely around his son.

“Oh Ben,” Han whispers. “It’s okay, I’m here. No matter what, I’ve got you.”

Ben feels the words wash over him, lets them sink in soothe the worry that one day he’ll become a monster. He matches his breathing to his dad’s heartbeat, allows the steady rhythm to push back the ever-growing fear that one day, he’s going to find that he is utterly alone and even worse…

That it will be all his fault.

“Dad,” Ben chokes, curling into his dad’s soft sleep shirt. “Don’t go.”

“Sshh,” Han soothes, bringing one hand up slightly to card through Ben’s hair. “I love you, Ben. And I’m not going anywhere, you hear me? I’m right here, kiddo. Right here.”

And Ben believes him.

**Author's Note:**

> I have a bunch more fills for this lovely fest, but I hand wrote them and now I need to type them all up. *sigh*  
> Come babble at me on [Tumblr](http://reignofdreams.tumblr.com).


End file.
